Mad As It Flows

The poem

An attempt in capturing an intense moment as the narrator owns their story.


“Its a mad world
as it flows
through your fingertips.”

You think?
In a blink,
you’re here.
I’m here.
Loud sounds.
Bright lights.
Deep wounds.

Its all
too much
to bear.

and you say
its a mad world
as it flows
through my fingertips?


Commentary

Ok, that was intense. Let’s rewind a bit. As I said, my writing is usually experimental. I honestly don’t know what these are. Poetry? Maybe. Do I care? No, not really. I’m mostly trying to play with words, communicate experiences, and satisfy my curiosity towards the subtleties of expression. I’m trying to not filter these pieces out (its a hard exercise). So here this goes, for the sake of writing boldness and putting up half done work because no piece is truly ever done anyways.

To be clear, when I’m writing, I might be thinking about an aggregation of real or imagined experiences through my eyes or through the eyes of others I imagine. So when you read this, I’m hoping you’re thinking of imagined characters. I want people to interpret this on their own, so I’m not adding my take here. Tell me what it means to you :)

Aside from meaning, What I was aiming for here is capturing a fleeting argument. It captures a somewhat intense and live example of the reaction of someone to gaslighting in a toxic relationship. They are being accused of expressing themselves through writing (yay for getting your own hobbies embedded into your characters) in a manner that is not in line with the accuser’s take on reality. The body’s verses are intentionally snappy and short to convey the narrator’s anger. At least in my head, the body is a bit of an angry rap song. In the concluding verse, as you might have noticed, I have a tendency to like verses that cycle back to the opening. However, this time, the narrator says it. They see gaslighting. They’re owning their narrative by expressing their reality, on their own terms.

Esra'a Saleh
Esra'a Saleh
MSc. Student